


Without Him Noticing

by todaywasasherlockday (orphan_account)



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Fluff, I mean Spock is stealing vulcan kisses, I'm sorry for this mess, Kissing, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, That's it, spirk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-05
Updated: 2015-01-05
Packaged: 2018-03-05 12:06:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3119585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/todaywasasherlockday
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock cannot contain his feeling for his captain anymore, so he starts to steal vulcan kisses.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Without Him Noticing

Spock was at his wits end. Not that anyone could tell, but internally, he was a wreck. He and Nyota had broken up just under 2 months into their 5 year mission. It had not been particularly amicable.

The reason for their spilt was down to one James T. Kirk, who Spock happened to be in love with.

He had been intrigued with the Captain of the U.S.S. Enterprise since they'd met. However, Spock soon learned that James T. Kirk was brash and self-centred. When Spock had first been appointed first officer, Jim had started a campaign to become friends with the Vulcan. At first, Spock was uninterested in spending time with the Captain outside of work hours, however he soon learned through working alongside him that Jim was not as brash as he had thought. Slowly, through chess games, sparing matches and joint paperwork sessions, the two men became friends. 

Looking back, Spock realized that he had fallen in love with the Captain slightly before the Khan incident, not that the Captain suspected anything. A year and a half into their five year mission and he remained blissfully unaware of Spock's feelings. Or so Spock thought.

* * *

The first time it happened, Jim was badly injured. Spock had told him not to go on that away mission, yet the Captain dismissed Spock's suggestion and had gotten himself hurt in the process.

Spock, having not meditated in the last 24 hours while he waited for the news about Jim's condition, was not fully in control when he was finally allowed to see him. Spock rushed to the bedside and picked up one of Jim's hands, holding it between his own. He could distantly hear Dr. McCoy informing him about the Captain's health.

"He'll live. It'll be awhile before he'll be able to be back on the bridge, but he'll be fine in two weeks or so."

"Thank you, Doctor." Spock spoke quietly, not looking away from his Captain who was still so pale.

* * *

 After sitting at the Captain's bedside, convincing himself that Jim would be ok, he left to meditate and sleep. As he walked through the halls of the Enterprise, he realized that the weight of his feelings for Jim were lighter than they had been in a long time.

It was a strange realization to come to. However, he knew exactly what had brought it on. He had, by vulcan standards, kissed Jim.

That evening, Spock managed to convince himself that Jim would certainly have no idea what the brushing of two fingers meant in the vulcan culture and that it would be harmless for him to perform such a thing with Jim when he was overwhelmed by his love for the Captain.

Spock realized that it was irrational, however, loving James T. Kirk was not a rational thing to begin with.

* * *

The next morning, Spock visited Jim in the medbay. He was awake and he visibly brightened when Spock entered the room.

"Spock! It's great to see you. Bones is driving me mad."

"Captain, I am pleased to see that you are awake." Spock replied, sitting next to the captain's bed.

Jim's smile widened, "You want to play a round?" He asked, motioning to the chess set that Spock had brought with him.

Spock nodded, and began to set up the board. And when their hands brushed as Spock handed Jim his pieces, Spock did not pull away immediately, he simply let his hand linger a moment longer, enjoying the Captain's contentment.

* * *

 

For four months, Spock would brush hands with the Captain on occasion. No one, save Uhura, seemed to notice. She, however, would stare daggers at both Spock and Kirk whenever it happened. 

Seeing as Spock normally felt affection and reassurance whenever he touched Jim's hand, Spock believed that the Captain thought of it as a gesture of support. He was glad that the Captain had no idea the implication of the action.

At the beginning it rarely happened, only when Jim had been exceptionally clever or courageous. A brush after he fought that Gorn, when he figured out how to handle a situation without violence, or when he wanted to stake his claim over the Captain in front of a visiting Vulcan dignitary that seemed oddly intrigued by the Captain.

However, Spock became addicted to the brief touch of Jim's hand and the quick glimpses of Jim's feelings. 

* * *

Spock tried to be content in sneaking vulcan kisses when Jim had been particularly clever, or courageous, however he soon found himself sneaking kisses when Jim was heading into a dangerous or stressful situation. When he was injured. When he returned safely. When he looked sad. When he looked particularly happy. When he won their nightly chess games. When he lost them. When they passed each other in the hall. 

After 6 months of secretly stealing kisses from Jim, Spock realized that the situation had grown out of control. He reined himself in and stopped touching Jim entirely.

* * *

One month after Spock stopped stealing vulcan kisses from Jim, the two men were sitting in the Vulcan's quarters playing chess.

Spock was distracted by Jim's hand as he moved one of his pieces up a level. How he longed to rub his fingers against that hand, but he knew that he would not be able to stop if he allowed himself to touch the Captain.

Suddenly, he felt a wave of concern. Looking down, he realized that the Captain had laid a hand upon his.

"Spock? Are you alright?"

"Of course, Captain." He replied, trying to discreetly remove Jim's hand from his own.

"Really?" 

"Vulcans do not lie, Captain."

"Spock, call me Jim." The Captain demanded, not allowing Spock to move his hand away.

"Jim, I am adequate, but I would appreciate if you released my hand."

"No. I want to know what I did." Jim replied, holding Spock's hand tighter.

Spock was aware that he could break the man's hold at any time, however, he was intrigued by the hurt that the Captain felt.

"I do not understand." Spock replied, bewildered.

"Why did you stop kissing me?"

"Captain... I.."

"Jim." He corrected.

"Jim. I did not realize..."

"That I knew what brushing fingers meant to vulcans? I don't mind that you snuck kisses, Spock. I just want to know why it stopped."

"Jim.... I..." Spock stammered, trying to explain himself as he felt a wave of Jim's all consuming love.

"Oh, come here you idiot." Jim said, standing and pulling Spock up as well. They stood face to face for a few seconds, their hands intertwined in an intimate vulcan kiss.

"I..." Spock tried again. He needed to explain himself and tell Jim how he felt. He needed Jim to tell him how he felt.

Jim suddenly pulled Spock into a human kiss. With the amount of contact that he was afforded Spock could feel love, concern, and hope radiating off of Jim. So Spock closed his eyes and kissed his Captain back.


End file.
